Happy Birthday, Andrew!

We were so glad to be celebrating Andrew's second birthday yesterday.  He has brought us so much joy in the two-and-a-half months that we've had him.  It's such a short time, but at the same time, it's hard to imagine when we didn't have him in our lives-- when we were just a family of three.

There are so many things we love about him.  His personality is sweet, caring, and funny, and he can also be a little bit of a stinker sometimes.  He's the first to console you if you're hurt (unless he does something to you, like pulls your hair-- then it's funny).  :)  He loves after-nap snuggles-- craves them, actually-- absolutely has to have them, and we are happy to comply.  He loves being chased and tickled.  He is a gymnast during diaper changes-- pulling the light-weight diaper mat over his body, running around to the very small space behind the crib, playfully kicking the wall, pulling the clean diaper out from under him and throwing it behind his head, doing all kinds of little boy things (you can use your imagination), and then pulling my hair with those same hands.  Sometimes I just laugh at the antics he pulls during diaper changes.  Other times, I am exasperated and firmly tell him no.  Yes, I know I'm being inconsistent.  More often lately, I  tell him no.   However, sometimes when I say that, he'll sternly look at me, shake  his index finger at me and say, "No!  No! No, no, no!"  Ha, ha!  He is ALWAYS, always moving and is not happy if he can't move. He has the attention span of a gnat.   He loves talking on the phone to people and to no one in particular.  One day, I called weather phone (a recording) just so he would have someone to talk to other than me on the pretend other line.  He's more interested in junk mail, magazines, boxes, phones, and reshelving books than playing with all the toys that Gabriel had at age two.

I've learned his likes and dislikes pretty well as far as food goes, too.  He dislikes bread and peanut butter and jelly (which is Gabriel's favorite lunch), so Mama has to get creative on what I can feed him.  Yes, sometimes, that means I resort to Spaghetti O's.  He doesn't like cheese at all, except on pizza.  He loves most fruits, most veggies (yay!), and almost anything else.  All in all, he is not a picky eater, which is great.  He's also persuaded Gabriel to try some foods that he previously disliked.

He loves and adores his brother, Gabriel and wants to do everything he does, which sometimes drives Gabriel crazy.  Other times, Gabriel is fine with that, and the transition to being a big brother has gone fairly smoothly with Gabriel.  I think he likes to have another kid to play with and hang around, despite having to play in the living room with "baby toys" since Andrew will still occasionally put small things in his mouth.

Most importantly, he is attached to us all.  He uses eye contact, engages with us, and always wants to be with us.  Attachment is a process, so we continue to use attachment techniques, but this has been a pretty smooth transition and bonding process so far.  We attribute this to his placement in a foster home on orphanage grounds for the first year of his life (before being moved back to the orphanage).

I think we did a pretty good job of making him feel special on his special day.  Sure, he liked the presents, but he also liked the balloons, the lunch at Chick-Fil-A, and the chicken and rice for dinner.  Most of all, he enjoyed being celebrated on his special day with the people he loves, including his  Grandma and Granddad.

I think of this day and thank God, literally, for his life.  He could have died rather than being found and cared for two years ago today.  The circumstances of his birth will be his story to tell or not tell someday, and we will not share it with anyone except him.  It brings us too much pain to think about.  Adoption is a blessing to those families who are able to care for, love, protect, and raise their children, but for the children, it's also about loss.  He lost this biological mother, then his foster parents, and then his orphanage.  He probably wonders still if he will lose us.  He's scared of losing us.  He cries when I leave to go out to the car to carry in groceries.   He shies away from strangers, likely wondering if they are going to be the next ones he'll be handed over to.

He'll soon learn that he's not going to be handed over to anyone else.  His is ours, and we are his.  Forever. And we are so happy to call him our son.  We love you, Andrew Yang Fischer, and hope that this next year of your life is a wonderful one!

Two Weeks Home

I can't believe it's only been two weeks since we've been home!  In some ways, it seems like much longer!  Andrew is bonding beautifully to us; we really couldn't ask for a better transition.  Gabriel goes back and forth between not wanting him interfering and loving him, but mostly, he loves him.   The other day, he told Howie thank you for bringing Andrew home, and he kissed Andrew before leaving on a short trip to the Dollar General.  He tries often to make Andrew smile and is so excited when this happens.  We're really proud of how helpful Gabriel has been and how kind he has been to Andrew, despite the  bites, scratches, and pinches he has received from his little brother.  Yes, we're trying to curb this and try to keep Gabriel away from Andrew when he's tired, which is when the teeth and pinching fingers tend to come out.

Last week, we packed up the kids and headed to Cincinnati, Ohio, to the International Adoption Clinic at the children's hospital there.   It was a five hour medical appointment.  We were visited by a social worker, developmental specialist, medical doctor, and occupational therapist.  Stool samples were given to check for parasites, vaccines were given for the flu and meningitis, and blood work was taken by ultrasound after he blew three veins from being so terrified of those nasty needles.  All in all, we thought it was a pretty good, thorough evaluation of how our little guy is doing, and the conclusion is that he's a pretty healthy little guy!  He has one "non-pathogenic, benign" parasite that just likes to hang out there and then eventually will go away.  This was due to poor hygiene at the orphanage, but it really poses little danger to all of us as long as his hands are washed after diaper changes (which he usually likes to do) and doesn't share a tub with Gabriel any time soon.  They usually don't even retest to see when this parasite has left, but we'll do that soon so that we can go back to having a kid tub and a separate tub for the parents.  :)

Andrew continues to amaze us and amuse us each day.  He talks a LOT and sings sometimes, too-- mostly baby talk, our guides in China told us.  He especially has a lot to say at dinner for some reason, and he uses his hands to talk too, sometimes pointing one finger in the air, sometimes using a whole hand to explain something.  He can say some English words, too, such as car, go, no, bye bye, hello, what, wait, mama, baba, and ZeZe (Gabriel's Chinese name), and he can say, "Gay" for Gabriel's English name.  We've seen signs that he's beginning to understand what we're saying in English, too.  If I tell him to go give something that he has to Baba or Gabriel, he'll usually do it.  He knows what "Say ____" means.  He know what "no" means, and I think he's quickly learning what "no bite" and "no pinch" mean.  He's already learned what "no throwing" means, as we taught him at meal time.  Yesterday, he quickly ran into the hallway, and since I wasn't sure if any doors were open, I yelled, "Wait! Wait! Wait!" really quickly, and he ran back to me, saying, "Wait!  Wait! Wait!"  Haha!  He is now sleeping in his crib in our bedroom and sleeps pretty soundly as long as it's quiet and there is no light in the room.  Most of the time, he sleeps through the night!   He has a stuffed animal that he loves, named "Bunny."

His favorite toy is one that you can push the button, lever, and move the dial on to reveal a dog, cat, and bird.  He sometimes has trouble with the dial one, so he has me take his hand in mine and move it the way it's supposed to go.  Then, eventually, he'll try it and get it, and he's so happy when he does it himself.  He also discovered the caterpillar, crawl-through tunnel yesterday and loves it.  We have to put a time limit on that one, though, or he gets kind of overwhelmed.

He loves pulling books off the bookshelves but doesn't care to sit still enough to have us read more than a few words.  He puts puzzle pieces in the play microwave instead of on the puzzle and gives a grin, like he knows he's not supposed to put them there.  He's ticklish on his belly.  He likes to move, move, move--- constantly!

He knows how to get what he wants, especially when it comes to eating.  A few days ago, he had cut-up hot dog pieces, mac and cheese, and veggies.  Howie and I fed him first, so he was done with his hot dog while we were still eating ours.  We then gave him his mac and cheese, and he kept pointing at our hot dogs until we were eating the mac and cheese only.  Still, he wouldn't eat his at first.  He wanted Howie's mac and cheese, so Howie gave him a few bites of his own until Andrew finally decided that he would eat his own if I would fork the minion noodles and then let him bring the fork to his mouth. He's working hard on trying to use utensils.  Today, he wanted to be the only one using the spoon to feed himself his yogurt.  Any time I tried to feed him, he responded with crying.  Poor kiddo.  Mommy's trying to practice bonding techniques, but he's almost two and wants to do what the rest of us do.  He is determined to use the spoon and fork correctly, and he's learning fast.  It can be messy, but that's all part of learning anything, isn't it?

He loves getting into everything, so tonight, Howie is putting up a gate so that he can only get into things in the living room unless we take him into another room. There's enough for him to get into in there, like the stereo, the TV converter box (yes, we still have one of those), and the TV antennae.   And I will hopefully soon be learning how to "wear" him.  I've never used a baby carrier before, but he gets extremely upset when I put him in my vision in a pack and play when I'm doing Gabriel's treatment each day.

He also loves giving hugs and has tried giving us kisses, we think, by just putting his lips on our cheeks.  Too cute.  Tonight, due to a short nap, he was very ready to go to sleep, but before he did, he kissed my hand several times.  He's such a sweetie.   He is appropriately scared of strangers, and clings to us when anyone approaches.  He knows he is ours, even now, but he's scared that there could be another move, another transition, another family.  It will take time for him to realize that we are his to stay. Forever. We are in love with each other.

Earlier this week, we visited my Nannie and Granddad's house to say farewell to my Aunt Dawn and Uncle Ralph who will be moving to Oregon soon.  While there, he had his first piece of cake.  Not wanting to get his fingers messy (using gestures, he's always asking for a napkin or paper towel), he was hesitant to dig in.  My brother, Michael, was the one who ultimatly got him to take the leap.  He showed him how to do it, even though it got icing in his goatee.  :)  We love Uncle Mike (and his wife, Aunt Danielle and daughter Gwendolyn)!

Here are some pictures from the event:

Here are some other pictures that Gabriel suggest we take.  Some are from a few days ago, and the fire fighter hats pictures are from today.  :)

Later this week, we have our first home visit from our adoption social worker.  We'll see her a lot this first year, since China requires periodic updates and visits along with written communication and pictures.  Time to figure out how to get these photos from my camera onto my regular PC so we can print!  He really does smile-- just not on cue for pictures yet.  :)

September 18- Big day to celebrate!

Today, we all had to wake up early, get dressed, and eat breakfast all before 7:30 am!  That meant that we had to wake up at 6:30 am-- earlier than we've ever had to wake up.  Why?  Today was our early appointment at the US Consulate office in Guangzhou!  We went through a brief interview process and exchanged paperwork so that our son's visa could be processed and we could come home together as a family.  Normally these visas can take two additional days to process, but we learned today that ours should be ready by tomorrow afternoon.  Unfortunately, it's too much of a hassle to change flight schedules and come home early, or we would have done so!

While at the consulate office, we noticed that one of Gabriel's arms had a series of bumps and scratches on it in kind of a patch.  I didn't think it looked like scabies, since usually that is seen in the webbing between the fingers and toes (and no signs there), but one of the other adoptive mamas looked at it, and said, "Oh... uh... I think he probably has scabies."  Then, another adoptive mama saw it and said, "I'm a doctor.  That's not scabies-- probably just an allergic reaction or eczema.  We double checked it quickly with a doctor at the international clinic across from the Consulate, and all it well.  He thought it was a mosquito bite, but our guide said it was probably some other kind of bug bite.  Whatever it was, he scratched it quite a bit last night.  There are a few other red spots on our little guy, but mostly likely those are eczema spots, too.  We're used to seeing that with Gabriel, so he'll switch over to Gabriel's eczema body wash and shampoo when we get home.

After the Consulate office, we went to a Chinese mall just to walk around.  Howie got at least one picture there, and we had Burger King for lunch.  Not much better than Burger King in the states, I have to say, but Andrew liked dipping his chicken nuggest in the sweet and sour sauce and did a good job of taking small bites of the nuggets, too, so that's a success!

After the mall, we all went back to the hotel and had a two hour nap, and after that, my back felt soooo much better.  It's still a bit sore tonight, but if I keep up with the Tylenol, it tends to keep the pain at bay a bit.  Also, I have to avoid walking on ramps and picking Andrew up from the bottom of the van when he wiggles out of Howie's or my arms while we're in transit someplace.  I have to limit that and steer him over to Howie's side of the van when that happens.  Thank goodness he'll have a carseat when home!  I'm sure he'll hate it, but we will love it!

Today was also our anniversary, so this made the day extra special.  After playing in the kiddie area with Andrew for a bit, we decided to eat al a carte at the downstairs cafeteria where we normally only have breakfast.  We spent a little more that usual on dinner, but it was our anniversary, after all, we were able to have pasta with meat sauce to celebrate.  Now, we're just hoping that the fresh parsley on top of our meal doesn't negatively affect us.  Howie ate most of his, and I picked the majority of mine off, but we're not supposed to have fresh, uncooked veggie or fruit that could have been contaminated by the water here.  We can't even use the water here to brush our teeth, so to be extra cautious after dinner, we ate a couple of pepto pills to coat our stomachs.  Wish us well!  So far, so good!

Tonight, after dinner and Andrew's bath (which he really needed after trying to drink some leftover congee), we were able to Skype with Howie's dad, which was nice.  During and after this, Andrew was completely wound up, so we once again went walking a little outside, went walking down our floor, went walking in the lobby just to try to get Andrew in the mood to fall asleep.  By the time we reached our room , he had rubbed his eyes a little bit but was still far from sleep.  We placed him in the crib which reulted in loud cries and big tears and then put him in our bed.  It probably took him 15-20 minutes to fall asleep, but that was all.  Not too bad.

Here are some pictures from today.  Really, though, you just have to meet this little guy.  The pictures just don't let you in to his full, happy, mischievous personality.   Oh, and if anyone has ideas on how to keep a 22 month old entertained on the plane ride home, let us know!  Gabriel, only two months older when adopted, was already very familiar with technology and willingly watched some movies and in general just played with the screen in front of us on the plane ride home.  Andrew shows no interest in technology whatsoever, which in general is good, but then we're left with the big question.  What are we going to do?  He throws every single toy he is given just for sport, and he puts things in his mouth, which means crayons are not an option.  If anyone else has suggestions, we're willing to take them!  :)  

Hope you are all doing well!

Blessings,
Jennifer